Lawima cancels summit after row over Dansu al Shirba`s attendance

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Sometimes, we have to make choices in life. It becomes often difficult when the choice is between appeasing a good friend and one`s personal economic survival. This is exactly the dilemma Lawima government was facing when it had to make a choice between succumbing to the pressure from several African countries to allow Dansu’s president Maro al-Shirba to attend the Union African summit in Lawima or to risk the wrath of the powerful Western countries and most likely lose their dangling millions of dollar aid cheques as well.

Faced with this uncomfortable situation, the government of Lawima decided instead to withdraw their interest to hold the upcoming July summit which was to take place in the country.
As the first sitting Head of the State to be indicted by the Court Criminal International (CCI), Dansu`s president al-Shirba has courted a lot of controversies. These controversies have led to continuous acrimony between many African leaders and their Western donor countries who would rather see Mr al Shirba held responsible for the atrocities in Furdar. On the other hand, many African leaders have accused the court of pursuing the Western agenda by indicting only Africans.

“Let us first help chase the hawk away, thereafter, we then will ask the mother hen, why she exposed her chicken to the hawk. It is al Shirba today, who knows, tomorrow it could be your turn.“ One African Head of State spoke to Kata Kata behind the camera.

It is therefore not for nothing that many members of the Union African (UA), many of them who ordinarily have personal antagonism against Mr. al Shirba, have strongly protested against what they called “˜politically motivated indictment.“ They went further to lobby for the arrest warrant to be deferred. The same members of the UA have gone further by putting unbearable pressure on Lawima government to allow the indicted Dansu’s president to attend the upcoming conference in Lawima.

Even though Lawima ‘s former leader, Gubin aw Rikamutha who died in office in April, had defied calls to apprehend Mr al Shirba, his successor, President Cejoy Daba prefers rather to appease donors in the hope of not losing their aid cheques.

“After considering the interests of Lawima people, I hereby inform my people that the cabinet has decided it was not interested to accept the conditions of the Union African, therefore Lawima is not hosting the summit. Much as we have obligations to the UA, we also have obligations to other institutions, which are the backbone of our economic survival, especially at this moment of our economic reforms.” the vice-president said.
But Dansu’s president, who cherishes hugs from other Heads of State so much, lobbied tirelessly, according to our moles, for the UA to move the venue of the meeting from Lawima`s capital Lilongwe to Ababa Addis, Opiaethi. This maneuver followed after it was obvious that Lawima would not succumb to the pressure of the UA to invite the indictee, Mr al Shirba to the meeting.

“That hug; I mean the brotherly hugs, show that we are still the same family, despite that the Western colonists are determined to sow the seed of disunity and disintegration amongst us. I might not be your ideal bed mate, but diplomacy often prevents you from showing it to the world. At the end of the day, our differences are hidden in the diplomatic hugs.“ Al Shirba told our reporter, smiling mischievously.

Some time ago, Kata Kata witnessed a typical hugging scene in Ababa Addis, Opiaethi between Daugan President Venimuse and Mr al Shirba, whom Palakam has long accused of harbouring (and some would say, arming) the notorious ARL rebel operating in the northern part of Daugan. Equally, Mr al Shirba has often accused, Palakam of supporting the recently seceded Sudan South. During this meeting, President al Shirba was heard by our moles whispering to Mr. Venimuse, who just wanted to fulfil his diplomatic obligations very quickly:

“Haba, hold me tighter now. Don`t forget those forced smiles. We both need them“ Dansu’s president Maro al-Shirba whispered to his Danugan counterpart.

Clearly, politics is a matter of personal interest and survival. It is give and take diplomacy. The ability to master this unwritten law is tantamount to political survival. But one thing is clear: survival does not mean eternity. Therefore, no political condition is permanent. Certainly, not even Lawima, al-Shirba or other African Heads of State can deny this unwritten truth.

The above story is a parody. It is entirely fictitious; therefore none of the characters mentioned in the story are real.